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meme-blog2-of-5Where’s your head at?

It’s that time of year- where we think about what’s to come, and what we want to achieve – although its flying past already! Maybe you are feeling stagnant? Is it that you are turning things over and over in your head and seemingly can’t escape the rat race to find clarity? Are you desperate to move forward…or at least just move? Maybe you are already moving- well done my friend!

As I write this series I find myself smashing a Santa cookie with my cup of tea, I am grateful, for all I have, all I am and all those who love and support me… It’s Boxing Day, I have eaten too much food as usual… so I can forgive the Santa cookie- for today!

I am humbled. I reflect and start to think about the millions of things I want to do this year. I find that familiar feeling of frustration creeping back again, my anxiety sending up the hair on the back of my neck, and I find myself thinking- “How am I even going to get even one of these things achieved?”

Sometimes having ideation as my number one skill can be very difficult to balance let alone feel balanced at all. I need to ask myself, “where am I looking today? Where’s my head at?

I decided to try a few new things this year and I recently did a 10-day journey of self-discovery in overcoming trauma after my own childhood nightmare. I will share this journey with you over the next 12 months, but part of this journey was about how to move forward and step into my OWN success. I have already been a successful athlete and faced my share of adversity in this life, but as old scars have reopened I have found myself facing new hurdles, with old skills.

I needed a new plan and as I shared in my previous blog, I like things to be simple. We don’t need to be creative geniuses to have a personal development plan. You don’t need to be a CEO of a large business. If you are the boss of a household; that is a big enough job. EVERYONE deserves the best chance to succeed at life. Everyone deserves to find their #UnscathedBeauty.

To do this, to make my own personal development plan – I had to ask myself some questions, and get very real with myself. It was time to face up to the things that hurt so I could chase my dreams without carrying around a large weight on my shoulders. It is time to be brave people… I don’t want to be bitter and resentful when that time comes because I never achieved my hearts own desires. My encouragement to you would be the following:

  • Give yourself the quality time and space to make a plan- you deserve to be your best, and your best can take time. (set yourself a date and time and stick to it) you may need a few hours.
  • Find someone who is willing to be your accountability partner, someone who can help you achieve success, and help you answer the tough questions- without dulling your flame. This person may not be your spouse or partner but someone outside your immediate circle.
  • Be willing to get very real with yourself, face your fears and be humble enough to admit your own strengths and weaknesses. (This is what gives you the space to grow and understand your purpose)
  • Be committed to the process. (Like I said I have tried to make it simple- I don’t do complicated so roll with it and you will be surprised at the outcome) If for some reason its not working for you I will be happy to help clarify.

I also came up with 5 belief statements that act as Mantra’s- they are to help me stay true to my own self and pushing towards my goals. I would encourage you to do the same- you can borrow mine or make statements that will drive you this year.

For example.

1- I have integrity

2- I am valuable

3- I am focussed

4- I am passionate

5- I will make a difference

What this does is creates a mindset for success- its like ploughing and fertilising a field before planting the seeds. You have to have your head right!

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Take the time to answer the tough questions. You are worth the effort and the journey to success. As Debi Auger- a business professional says, “Before you can master your business- or your life, you must first master your mindset.”

Stay tuned for part 3 moving into your best- Kel’s 5-point plan for success.

You can find step 1/5 here.

 

 

 

 

 

#Personal Development #KellyHumphries #5pointplan #Author #Success #SexualAbuse. #Overcome

Happy Holidays and best wishes

merry-christmas

As Christmas dawns on the horizon- and is already upon us I remember the sweet innocence of those twinkling lights, the star on the tree and how we rocked along to Disney’s Christmas Carols – singing our hearts out like the sweet little birds that we were as kids- or maybe not so sweet!

While we innocently waited for Santa to come and bring his sack full of toys, with absolute wonderment and joy and we revelled in the moments of true connection and love, as life waged its war with time we became like the crinkles in the corner of our eyes. Lost in time.

We pitter patted around and put cookies and milk out for Santa, carrots for the reindeer… and we would be in bed early because, ‘He see’s you when your sleeping- and knows when your awake.’ So quickly and seeded with anticipation we would wait for the first one to wake up on Christmas morning… and the screaming and excitement would begin.

I cry as I write this, because I realise what I have missed and what I mourn… What my heart aches for and what life does to us if we don’t keep things in check. As a survivor of Sexual abuse, I have learnt this phenomenon of the ‘inner child.’

I might point out I thought this was all very cliché. But I come to realise very quickly that my innocence, that child was part of me and still is. We all have the memories of our youth that shape and mould us. We all still have that beautiful innocence and joy of children within us- we just forget it is there when life and adversity rears its head and we are forced to act like adults.

I remember how much fun I had at Christmas, and yet the dark sadness of what lay beneath and what was happening would see the simple joys fade like a moment of sunshine flittering in and out behind dark clouds. I was not like the other kids.

My little girl was stolen from me by my Uncle; just like joy may be stolen from you, through situation or circumstance, or maybe just pain… I lost her. I lost her sweet song and her dance in the pain of my innocence lost. My #UnscathedBeauty: all that I am, all that I was meant to be. My laughter and smiles- where did that unbridled laughter go?

It became tinged with deceit. That’s where it went. It become chained by fear and lost in the feeling that no place was safe, and the world was scary. I had to grow up, just so I could live.

Maybe you had to grow up too…really fast. Maybe you are holding on for all you feel you are worth. Perhaps you feel that have no more strength. No time. No money. Perhaps you have forgotten the beautiful wonderful things in this life Maybe your little inner child gone into hiding and you don’t know where they went.

img_6641That’s ok- I only just found her myself skipping around the Christmas tree and singing Christmas carols.

Do the things that make you smile! Build a cubby house or do a colouring in picture. Turn the sprinkler on, run underneath it and laugh like you don’t care. Lick the bowl when you make your next cake and let it smear all over your face…
Look at the people around you and take joy in the simplicity.

It’s is not about things and stuff… They won’t matter later. Love matters and #connectionmatters. Take time to connect with people. Connection creates healing.

So, from my family to yours have an incredible, simple, connected and loving Christmas, filled with innocence, joy and uninhibited laughter!

Much Love- Kel xo

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Your Unscathed Beauty is everything you are, and everything that you are meant to be.

You are not your past. You are not your pain. You are more than what you see in your physical self. You are more than the voices you hear about who you are. You are more than a label, or a passing phase.

You matter. You are designed for a purpose and that is why you are unique.

There is nothing that compares to the #human spirit. Your spirit. The will to survive, the courage and strength it takes to face your deepest of fears.
Your #UnscathedBeauty lives in you and beckons to you to come out and reveal yourself to the world. The light inside you, which can shine brighter than you have ever dreamed. It is that thing in you that aches, screams and eats at you. It doesn’t let you rest because it is your call; your #destiny.

It is also who you choose to become when the world throws ‘life’ at you. It is what you hold on to when times get hard, as they do in life. Let it be the light of the beauty in you that leads you, not the dark that deceives you.

Your Unscathed Beauty is all that you can be- and you own it. It is yours and no person or situation can take it from you.

Hold onto it, nurture it and then- Unleash it!

#KellyHumphries #Author #Speaker #JohnMaxwellTeam

 

 

Sharing my story, IWD March 11th

International Women’s Day Celebrations- 2016 

I was so privileged this past week celebrating International Women’s Day with so many of my colleagues and friends across the Queensland Police and Emergency Services. What an incredible week it has been. I have been surrounded by phenomenal women (and men) with amazing stories that have both inspired, bought joy, hope and reminded me what is important in my own life, and it is only the beginning. In spreading my own message, and sharing my story, I only seem to find meaningful and wonderful connection, love, friendship and support. This was certainly the case at this years Crime Stoppers International (Pine Rivers) High Tea and International Women’s Day event on the 11th of March at Kallangur. I was so grateful to come and share my journey at this lovely event.

This week has brought me to my knees, I have cried, I have laughed, and I have even held others in my arms while they cried. I am constantly learning from other peoples journeys, their hopes, and it all comes down to one thing. LOVE. It’s a love I cannot describe because it surpasses anything I fully understand.  I can only say that it is and always has been bigger than me or anything I can do in my own strength. All I know is to keep walking, even when I can’t see where the next step falls. That is faith. When you align your heart with your head, beautiful things happen even when you are scared, when you feel alone, or if you feel unloveable, broken or like you are failing. You are never alone.

For me, it is an answer to a long awaited prayer, and all I really needed to do was say no to my fear. I have struggled more than anything in the last few months to harness my courage and strength. I have much to do, but I know that with the incredible support and love I have received from all of you, my friends, family, and colleagues, I cannot fail. I even have the support of the Queensland Police Service and for that I am grateful and so very humbled. I attended the International Women’s Day Event at the Pullman hotel, on the 08th of March and was Awarded a award for Courage, which I did not expect, or do I feel worthy. But I am humbled that the QPS is behind me in this journey. International Women’s Day Awards

I have many messages, and I do talk as openly as I am able to about how I have overcome Sexual Abuse; and there are many reasons for this which i will share in a later blog for you, but essentially it comes down to this. Your past does not define who you are, or who you become. No one has the power to take your voice. You are made with a purpose, a passion and you are incredibly unique. There is nothing that can stop you from achieving the desires of your heart. “It is time, to conquer your fear and unleash your Unscathed Beauty”

Thank you for coming on this journey with me. Thank-you for sharing your heart with me and allowing me to speak to yours. It is only when we work together can we really affect change, and I can’t do it alone. Bless you my friends.

Much Love, Kel.